I bent a spoon with my mind

Tanya Cross on December 11, 2021

I bent a spoon with my mind on Wednesday.

Say what?!

I was given 5 tablespoons at the start of the Quantum Spoon Bending course on Monday.

I gave it my best effort to bend these metal utensils with all my might (so much so I had a vein popping out of my head I was trying so hard) but it did not budge.

They became my friends for three days, hanging with me everywhere I went. I felt connected to them, and even worried about them when I didn’t know where I put them.

Now, let’s get something straight about spoon bending ????.

It isn’t a scene from Carrie, where you look at the spoon, and it twists around in circles.

There is some action by touching the spoon that is required.

The part of bending it with the mind was using these;

  • Intention
  • Certainty
  • Focus
  • Energy
  • Belief
  • And the exponential power of love

Plus you’re in a meditative state too, accessing your higher powered self so that helps to access a greater power too.

Now, over the period of the three days, doubt flooded me. Doubt in the possibility of doing it.

What if I spent all this money and I don’t bend a spoon? Plus, 3 days away from my daughter is a lot for no outcome.

Like we do in Maximum Growth classes, I looked for the problem under the problem. It revealed doubt was a coverup for the drive to excel entangled with a fear of failure.

We have that in everyday life. We doubt if we can make money, grow our business, take a break for a moment and our business survive.

I became comfortable with failure. I realised there is only love (thanks to some divine intervention from a book I found). I owned where I have bent reality in different moments in life.

So, waking up on Wednesday, I felt certainty run through my veins.

We get ready to bend spoons for the first time.

I’m laying down, my spoons on my belly and flowing with the guided meditation.

After a while, I’m instructed to pick up the spoon. Our instructor says over the top of the meditation in a soothing voice, “treat your spoon like your lover.”

“Oh la la… how lucky is this spoon.” (nothing is missing moment, thank you very much universe).

Getting serious, I connected with my spoon, feeling it, being grateful for its existence, then started to feel like it was an extension of myself. I felt an enormous amount of love for this spoon. I began to rub the spoon like I was caressing my own arm.

Over a period of time, I could feel the energy in my fingers transfer to the spoon.

It wasn’t just two fingers, all my fingers felt like they were on fire. I’d touch the spoon in a different spot and the spoon would become hot.

I tried to bend the spoon, but nothing.

This could have been a deflating moment where I doubted I couldn’t do it, but my certainty about doing it outweighs my reality of not feeling it happen.

(that’s a life lesson right there – believing over your current reality!)

I kept talking to the spoon, imagining the particles vibrating with my touch. I kept repeating “bend” and tried again.

Nothing.

My internal cheer squad stepped in now, “Tan, you’ve got this.”

After a few more attempts, I pushed the spoon with some pressure it bent to a right angle and stopped in its tracks.

“Thank you spoon.”

Without hesitation, I picked up the next spoon, ready to go again.

Repeating my internal mantras, my certainty of the possibilities increasing, I attempt to bend the second spoon.

Nothing.

Again.

Nothing.

The third time, there was movement, a little more than last time.

Onto the third spoon.

This one was a little heavier than the first two. I touched this spoon for about 10 seconds and felt drawn to bend.

Without questioning, I touched the tip of the spoon, and this time, it felt as if it was liquid and bent with grace and ease all the way back to the handle in one fluid movement.

Round one is complete and we come out of round one of meditation.

Here is what I learned;

  • Even when something is fixed, it can also be flexible given different circumstances.
  • Focused energy builds momentum
  • And doubt cancels abundance and possibilities

So consider what you doubt as a possibility now?

And what would you like to shift in your mindset to create certainty in your life?

Something to ponder as we step into 2022.

With gratitude,

 

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Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator
BAppSoSc (Counselling)
Maximum Growth
One on one & group coaching available

Helping leaders to level up using a transformational mindset work.

PS. If you’re keen to watch the Ask Me, Anything class, where I explain the spoon bending experience in more detail, click here.

Who needs a clutter free environment to work?

Tanya Cross on December 4, 2021

It’s amazing what will distract you during the day.

You set the intention to work. You’re ready and geared to reduce your inbox, create some content, do those admin tasks that have been building up. Today is the day!

Start time approaches.

You’re about to walk to your desk, and you notice the house is a mess. You wonder how it managed to get to this state while picking up after the other family members.

Your focused is on tidying. Your eye catches the pile of dishes in the kitchen that was left from breakfast.

Without even thinking you’re stacking the dishwasher and wiping the benches. Then work pops into your mind. You say to yourself, “I’ll get to it in a minute, I’ll just finish here first.”

You’re 30 minutes behind when you make your way to the office.

Your eyes dart to the piles of papers, the leftover cup from yesterday, little grubby paw prints over your laptop keypad from someone eating something sticky.

#Mydeskismysanctuary… A few choice words to the family member responsible.

You can’t focus on what you have to do without having a clear and clean space to work (deep sigh).

You’ve tried to work in the mess before. But the mess in your environment creeps into your headspace and you can’t seem to collect your thoughts. You’re frustrated at others, you’re upset they don’t think of you and you have to do so much around the house.

Plus, you’re a perfectionist and want things to be ‘just right.’ Your environment has to be perfect, your work perfect, you have to be the perfect spouse, parent, friend.

I know this experience to be true for many people because it’s a common problem that clients who run a business and a household (plus work from home) raise in a session.

As you know your clients can sometimes be a reflection of yourself so I’ll put my hand up to say I’ve focused on cleaning and not working at times (it happens now when I am stressed, some people bite their nails, I clean).

I have dug deep into the depths of mine and others’ internal thinking to understand why.

Here is the top learning that has been the most helpful in transforming this experience.

Life is like a juggling act of priorities. Which thing is more important than another?

You’ll know what’s important by the decisions you make in your life.

Essentially, every point in your life is a decision.

You wake up in the morning. You decide what you’re going to do next. Do you pick up your phone and scroll through social media to see what the world is doing? Do you open your emails to see if any income work came through overnight? Or read your mission statement in your notes? Or channel your pre-2008 life version (no smartphones peeps) and lay there contemplating your day?

8 am comes around and you’re deciding (if you’re in a job or have your own business) what you’re going to do next.

At night when the kids are in bed, you have another decision point. Do you read a book you’ve been contemplating for weeks that sits on your bedside table or Netflix all night? Do you stay up one more hour and watch one more episode because you can’t go to sleep without knowing what happens next? (Which it does for every episode and you say to yourself “I’ll go to sleep earlier tomorrow night”).

Have you ever stopped to contemplate are the decisions you’re making leading you to the goals you have in the future?

Consider it.

Reflect on your last week.

Did you do the things to help move the needle a little closer in the direction you’re aiming for?

Or did the decision distract you?

If it’s not tidying the house that distracts you, maybe it’s something else like mindless scrolling of social media or family/relationship distractions or other people’s problems in business.

Whatever it is for you, you’re the captain here. No one else is making you do anything you don’t want to do with your life.

Remember the quality of your life is determined by the quality of questions you ask and the quality of answers you provide.

You can ask the question at every decision point what is more important right now for my future self?

Is what I’m about to do leading me to where I’d love to grow and go?

If yes, great. Go take a step or a leap forward.

If not, pause. Look at the drawbacks of what you don’t want to be doing. Drawback. Drawback. Drawback. And find the benefit of what you’d like to do instead. Benefit. Benefit. Benefit.

Inch by inch. Day by day. You’ll start to notice that your life is unfolding exactly in the way that you’d love it to be.

Because let’s face it. Do you want to be known for a tidy home or for sharing your light with the world?

Go shine bright stardust.

With gratitude,

 

Signature

Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator
BAppSoSc (Counselling)
Maximum Growth
One on one & group coaching available

Helping leaders to level up using a transformational mindset work.

PS. Feeling a little distracted with low priorities and want to redirect your focus? Keep an eye out next week for our New Years Classes to refocus and create an inspiring 2021.

What if no one showed up to my event?

Tanya Cross on November 28, 2021

My first group coaching session as a facilitator 11 years ago was a hot flaming mess.

The truth is, it was so disastrous that I was probably lucky only 3 people showed up to witness the carnage (and one I dragged them to it and made them sit with a ball and chain to do their work – ah the learnings are so palpable).

So crushed at the flop that I turned into that screaming-at-the-top-of-her lungs teen, as she slams her bedroom door energy, “This will NEVER happen to me AGAIN! (while then asking “what’s the goddamn benefits Tanya!)”

I had no understanding of what it meant to run a business.

Actually, the idea of running a business wasn’t even a thought. I wanted to be a coach, not a business owner.

Lordy, was I naïve, or what?!

Cue to today…

Now I’m a little older and wiser (with a lot more grey hairs too).

After 11 years of growing a coaching business, I have realized business is the vehicle for you to express your service to the world. So it’s helpful to love business too.

And I have realized so much more:

  • It didn’t matter so much that I’d learned a bunch of new things that I wanted to share with clients.
  • It didn’t matter so much that I was getting a lot of shit done.
  • It didn’t matter so much that I had a growing base of engaged followers.
  • It didn’t matter so much that some of the people on the sidelines wanted and wished me to fail.
  • It didn’t matter so much that I didn’t know how to read a profit and loss statement.

It mattered that I sincerely and deeply cared about serving people.

If I show up, if you knew you were being cared for, if you knew you had someone on your team, no matter what, people would talk.

And people talked.

Slowly, the word was out.

And my business grew.

But it isn’t only about others talking about your business. You have to start speaking about what you do to others too.

And can I tell you, from my experience as a coach, and helping people to grow themselves to grow their business, this struggle comes up a lot.

People genuinely find it difficult to talk about what they do. Mainly due to uncertainty about the service they offer.

If you can’t clearly articulate what you do to others, how do they know what they will come to you for? Or how others can refer people to you?

So how do you tackle such a problem?

In our Business Membership Class this week, the group focused on defining your perfect problem.

I thought I’d give you a little peek inside the class because I know you’d benefit greatly from the deep existential questioning.

Many businesses, when developing new products, processes, or just even serving clients, haven’t defined the problems they’re attempting to solve and articulated why those issues are important to the client to solve.

Instead, they create a solution before identifying the problem (this is especially true for coaches as they are solution-outcome focused).

So let’s get a little wisdom with the genius Albert Einstein. He said “If I were given one hour to save the planet, I would spend 59 minutes defining the problem and one minute resolving it.”

Hmm…

It makes you reflect on how much time you’ve spent defining the problem.

So circle back to when I struggled to get bums on seats at my first event. My focus was on getting people in the room. My self-driven focus was gaining experience with my craft.

The focus wasn’t on what problem people faced, how the program could shift or solve the problem for them.

I was essentially wishing clients my way, not working to get them to attend.

So how do you define a perfect problem?

  1. Start with brainstorming all the potential problems in your industry, with your clients, with the world and with the ones that stand out, flesh them out a bit more.
  2. Write the problem as a problem (not the solution).
  3. And just like when you apply the Demartini Method and you’re heart opens when you hit something meaningful, the same thing will happen here too.

If we focus on asking the perfect question/s so that they tackle the perfect problems for our business, mission and life, we create multiple layers of purpose and direction in our business.

So, for example, Maximum Growth, which I founded in 2020 was created because leadership can be a lonely journey, there is a disconnection in relationships with self, family, business, because of a lack of education in how the mind works. There is uncertainty in how to apply and integrate the Demartini Method and universal principles in everyday life.

And one which makes me a little teary is so many people are not living up to the light that is within them (oh you feel that one don’t you).

These perfect problems create the purpose of why you do what you do. It helps to put any first (or 50th) event flop into perspective and focus on solving the bigger problem at hand.

Because remember, your purpose is the driving force of your business.

And let’s face it, you can work out how to read a profit and loss statement along the way.

So what perfect problem/s would you love to dedicate your life to?

With deep pondering thoughts,

 

Signature

Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator
BAppSoSc (Counselling)
Maximum Growth
One on one & group coaching available

Helping leaders to level up using a transformational mindset work.

PS. Come join the Maximum Growth Academy for your opportunity to learn and apply quality questions every week.

Sapiens

Tanya Cross on November 23, 2021

Sapiens

Bear with me, this review is a little longer than normal as it’s our entire 70,000 years. This book is for anyone who wants to know who we are and where we have come from.

Harari starts off the book beautifully by stating that 13.5 billion years ago, matter, energy, time and space came into being (AKA the big bang) which is the story of physics. 300,000 years later complex structures called atoms, molecules happened and their interactions which is the story of chemistry. Then 3.8 billion years ago a planet called earth, certain molecules combined to form particular organisms which is the story of biology. 70,000 years ago, organisms belonging to the species called Homo Sapiens started to form elaborate structures called cultures. The development of these cultures is called history. Our history has had the Cognitive Revolution (70,000 years ago), the Agricultural Revolution (12,000 years ago) and the Scientific Revolution (500 years ago). This book tells the story of the constant evolutions of man.

Compared with other animals’, humans are born prematurely as their vital systems are still underdeveloped. A kitten forages on its own a few weeks after birth. A colt can trot shortly after birth. Humans babies are helpless, dependent for many years on their elders for sustenance, protection and education.

This fact means humans have had to form an extraordinary social ability. Lone mothers could hardly gather enough food for their offspring hence consequently rely on other family members and neighbors to raise their children. As you have heard before, it takes a tribe to raise a human. Evolution has favored those forming strong social ties for survival.

Human are easily molded. Harari described humans like molten glass from a furnace. They can be spun, stretched and shaped with a surprising degree of freedom. This is why today we can educate our children to become Christian or Buddhist, capitalist or socialist, career focused or family orientated.

Tools were used in early years for food. You never approached a pride of lions eating its prey. When they were done you would dare not go near the hyenas and jackals as the scavenge for leftovers. Only then would you approach the carcass, look carefully left and right and eat the edible remains. You’re also left with the bones. Using tools like stones to break open the bones and eat the marrow, a highly nutritious part of the carcass. Num num num.

Homo’s position on the food chain was generally in the middle. They hunted for smaller creatures and were hunted by larger predators. There were 6 types of Homo’s, Homo Sapiens (that’s us) outplayed, outsmarted and outlasted the others 400,000 years ago as some species of man started to hunt larger game using strategies like team work to out maneuver them. Thus, hunting larger game on a regular basis. Only in the last 100,000 years with the rise of Homo Sapiens that man has jumped to the top of the food chain.

Before the Cognitive revolution there was the Foraging Revolution. The size of the average Sapiens brain has decreased since the age of foraging. Survival in that era required superb mental abilities from everyone. When agriculture and industry came along people could increasingly rely on the skills of others for survival, and new niches were opened up. Yes, our brain become smaller to adapt.

Foragers mastered not only the surrounding world of animals, plants and objects of their outer world but their inner world of their own bodies and senses for survival. They had to remember which of the 10,000 types of berries, plants, root and much more foods to eat and which to avoid. They were in tune with their surroundings, listened to the slighted movement in the grass and hear a snake in the bush.

Forgers secret to success and a longer life expectancy which protected them from malnutrition and starvation was their varied diet. During the Agricultural Revolution, farmers tend to eat the crop they grew. So, if they harvest rice, potato or wheat the family would live off that one and only food source which lacked essential nutrition. Ancient foragers ate dozens of different foodstuffs, maybe berries and mushroom in the morning and rabbit and wild onion in the evening. Tomorrow’s menu would be different.

The appearance of new ways of thinking and communicating between 70,000 and 300,00 years ago constituted the Cognitive Revolution. What caused it? They are not sure. Perhaps an accidental genetic mutation changed the inner wiring of the Sapiens brain enabling them to think in unpredictable ways and communicate using an altogether new type of language.

I love that; this mutation could have happened in Homo Neanderthals or Homo Erectus, but it didn’t. It was by pure chance. We are here by pure evolutionary chance. It’s more important to understand the importance of the genetic mutation than the cause. What was most surprising about the special language was it enabled us to conquer the world.

In conquering the world, we invented stories to tell one another. There are no gods in the universe, no nations, no money, no human rights, no laws and justice outside of the human imagination. So, if this is all created by our imagination and actions, what could you create in your own life? Imagine the possibilities.

Since the Cognitive Revolution, Sapiens have been living in a dual reality. One the one hand, the objective reality of rivers, trees and lions; and on the other hand, the imagined reality of gods, nations and corporations. As time went by the imagined reality become even more powerful, so that today the very survival of rivers, trees and lions depend on the grace of imagined entities such as the United States, Starbucks and Google. This shows we have evolved to create greater levels of influence and awareness to govern.

Now, most people know we are much like chimpanzees. And we are embarrassingly similar to chimpanzees on a one to one or ten to ten level. Significant difference occurs past 150 and when we reach 1000 – 2000 levels of Sapiens/Chimpanzees. If you tried to bunch 2000 chimpanzees into Time Square, there would be pandemonium. Imagine it. There would be fighting, power struggles, disorder. Bunch humans together in this same space and we are order seeking, creating patterns such as trade networks, mass celebrations and political institutions that never could be created in isolation. So, we are constantly looking for order in our own life and life around us. Maybe that’s why we rose above all other animals as the people or people with the most order rules. Then the person with the most order, rules too.

Now let’s move onto the Agricultural Revolution. Mortality was high. Babies weaned at an early age and were fed wheat because of the Agricultural age. Children lived more on porridge than mothers milk. There was competition for the porridge among siblings. Mortality levels rose. In the Agricultural societies, at least one in every three children died before the age of 20. Yet the increase in births still outpaced the increase in deaths.

Scholars once proclaimed that the Agricultural Revolution was a great leap forward in humanity. They told of a tale of progressed fueled by human brain power. Evolution gradually produced ever more intelligent humans. Eventually humans were so smart that they could decipher natures secret codes, enabling them to tame sheep and cultivate wheat. We moved from foraging to farming.

During the Agricultural Revolution, hunters may have caught and adopted a lamp, fattening it up for slaughter. At some stage, there become a greater number of lambs and they would slaughter the more aggressive lamps first. The more submissive, most appealing lamps were allowed to live longer and procreate. The result was a herd of domesticated and submissive sheep. Pigs had their snouts cut off so they could not smell or their eyes gauged out so they could not see where they were going to ensure they stayed with their owner.

As humans spread around the world, so did their domestic animals. Ten thousand years ago, not more than a few million sheep, cattle, goats, boars or chickens live. Today there is over a billion sheep, a billion pigs, a billion cattle, and more than 25 billion chickens. I think there are more chicken on the earth than other animals because no chicken is worshiped by any religion.

Agricultural Revolution made the future far more important. Humans started to think about life in seasons and crops, worrying about next year and the year after. Foragers discounted the future as they lived hand to mouth. A little like our factory workers today, working paycheck to paycheck, day to day, week to week.

They did not need to worry about what they could not control.

In the Agricultural Revolution future was more important than ever before. Famers must keep the future in mind. There were peaks in food availability at the end of harvest but famers were back planting within weeks. Concerns for the future was rooted not only in the seasonal cycle of production but also in the fundamental uncertainty of agriculture. Since most villages lived by cultivating a very limited variety of domesticated plants and animals, they were at the mercy of droughts, floods and pestilence. People began to worry about the future.

A natural order was a stable order. Believing in God created stability among the people. This was just an imagined order, and to keep this in place, continuous and strenuous efforts were imperative. The monetary system or Peugeot is a couple of examples of orders. You can see why the monetary system is, almost everyone believes in it.

Every level has something above governing it, the people have the local government, the local government have the state government, the state government have the federal government, they have other countries, the UN, the monetary system governing them. There is no way out of this imagined order.

Harari states that when we break down our prison walls and run towards freedom, we are in fact running into more spacious exercise yards of a bigger prison. Nothing is every missing, we always have freedom from that which we have power over and imprisonment or constraint from that which has power over us.

Let’s talk about the brain in relation to our evolution. It is limited to the amount of data it can store. Secondly, when a human dies, so does the information. Thirdly, we are wired to store and process only particular types of information. In our hunter and gather days we had to remember 1000’s of types of berries, shrubs, what made us well, and what made us ill. Also, we had to know social dynamics of the tribe. As we progressed, the Agricultural days saw us requiring, understanding, store and remember numbers. We didn’t need to know how many berries and roots we picked as a forager but we needed to know how many seeds we planted, how big our crop would grow, how much it would produce. Our brain adapted to understanding mathematics. Well, some of us are still trying to understand it now.

Then let’s think about today’s society. I wonder what computers, social media and texting are helping us to adapt to now?

As much as some things have evolved, some parts of our society are still evolving. In the past raping a woman who did not belong to a man was no classed as rape, like picking up a coin from a busy street was not classed as stealing. Raping your wife was an oxymoron, the man had full control of the woman’s sexuality. Saying a husband raped his wife was like saying a man stole from his own wallet. This thought wasn’t confined to ancient Middle East. In 2006, there were still fifty-six countries where men could not be prosecuted for the rape of his wife. This is because women in many countries are the property of the men, often the fathers, husbands and brothers.

Now let’s explore empires. Empires do not work according to Harari. In the long run, it is not possible to rule effectively over a large number of conquered people as empires are self-destructive and exploratory. Everyone has the right to self-determination and shouldn’t be the rule of another. Empires have been in rule for the last 2500 years. This is an example of the empowerment-disempowerment model.

Then, the destruction of an empire didn’t mean independence for the people. Instead, a new empire stepped into the vacuum created when the old one collapsed or retreated This is the balance of powers, a conservation of powers, it is like a baton being passed from one empires hand to another.

And then we come to the Industrial Revolution which was new ways to convert energy and to produce goods. Today, the earth is home to 7 billion sapiens. Global warming, rising oceans and widespread pollution could make the earth less hospitable to us and the future might consequently see a spiraling race between human power and human induced natural disasters.

Many call this process ‘the destruction of nature’ however I love how Harari states that “but it’s not really destruction, its change.” Nothing can ever be gained or lost, only transformed. We will learn to be more adaptable. Or we all die off and like with the dinosaur’s era, maybe intelligent rats or maybe cockroaches will rule the earth. Today we can thank the dinosaur killing asteroid for our existence.

Harari goes on to talk about happiness levels in humanity. As we know you can’t have happiness without sadness and all traits are conserved in and through time. What was interesting was that community seems to have an impact on our life experience more than money or health. We have the ability to create wealth but it leaves us more alone, we have access to an arsenal of modern medicine but our expectations of ease and pleasure, and our intolerance for inconvenience and discomfort have increase to such an extent that we suffer. Maybe that’s because when we seek easy, you get difficult.

So, what does the future hold for us according to Harari? What he shares is this; we have split the atom, we have travelled into outer space, we have grown a human ear on a rat, we have bionic body parts which are controlled by thoughts, we can map a human genome and create medicine to suit your DNA. The future is yet to be decided with what we do now.

Hugs and heart,

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The Field

Tanya Cross on November 23, 2021

The Field

This book is perfect for anyone who wants to understand the interconnectedness that permeates the universe, bridging spirituality and science together.

McTaggart uncovers that the human mind and body are not separate but connected to a sea of light, sound and energy and that consciousness may be central in shaping our world at a quantum level. This connection is known as The Field.

Light in The Darkness
The overview effect is described in the first chapter. This was first experienced by Ed Mitchell, who was the 6th man to land on the moon and the first to experience a feeling of connectedness. He described it as if all the planets and all the people of all the time were attached by some invisible web. This was a majestic sight, seeing the earth as a floating spaceship surrounded by darkness, Ed wept at the sight.

Philosophers had talked about this connectedness. David Bohm’s vision of a world of ‘unbroken wholeness’ and implicate state.

Scientists at the time did not allow for this connectedness, except for in quantum world, in the very, very small world, in the world of the inanimate and non-living. Quantum physics had discovered a strange property in the subatomic world called ‘non-locality.’ This refers to the ability of a quantum entity such as an individual electron influenced another quantum particle instantaneously over any distance despite there being no exchange of force or energy. This suggested that when quantum particles have been in contact remain connected even when separated, so that the actions of one will always influence the other, no matter how far they are separated.

Albert Einstein coined this term ‘spooky action at a distance.’ Matter was no longer separate.

This connectedness brought in the idea of that the universe had a living consciousness. It suggested that the consciousness of the observer brought the observed object into being. Nothing in the universe existed as an actual ‘thing’ independently of our perception of it. Every minute, of every day, we are creating our world.

It leaves me to wonder is this the same that is happening to us with any person we have a connection with, that we were creating our world?

The Sea of Light
To understand this field first let’s look at it relative to people and start by asking the following question;
What are people made of? People are made of muscles, bones, and organs.
Then what are the organs made of? Organs are made of cells.
What are cells made of? Cells are made of organelles.
What are organelles made of? Organelles are made of proteins.
What are proteins made of? Proteins are made of amino acids.
What are amino acids made of? Amino acids are made of atoms.
What are atoms made of? Atoms are made of protons, neutron, and electrons.
What are electrons made of? Electrons are made from the electron field.

What is the electron field made of? …..

This is where we end eight levels down. This is the hard limit of our scientific understanding. To the best of our present ability to perceive and to reason, the universe is made from fields and nothing else and these fields are not made from any smaller components.

Within the field, there is an uncertainty principle developed by Werner Heisenberg who created quantum theory. This theory implies that no particle is ever at rest as it is constantly in motion due to a ground state field of energy constantly interacting with all subatomic matter. It means that the basic substructure of the universe cannot be eliminated and is always in motion.

Beings of Light
Fritz-Albert Popp was a philosopher as much as he was a scientist. He was fascinated with light. He tried to make sense of the world around him, to find solutions that he could apply to everything in life. He research was condemned by his colleagues for many years but he managed to stay driven and forge on through the setbacks. He was willing to embrace both pleasure and pain, not needing permission to live his mission.

In his time as a professor at university, Popp created a light machine, something to register the omission of light from cells. Plants for instant radiated 100 photons per square centimeter, whereas humans would emit 10 photons in the same area. When light was shone on living cells, the cell would take up the light and after a certain delay, shine intensely, a process called ‘delayed luminescence’. Popp believed this was a corrective device. The organism had to maintain a delicate equilibrium of light. In this instance, when it was being bombarded with too much light, it would reject the excess.

The human body is amazing. Every cell undergoes around 100,000 chemical reactions per second and simultaneously repeats itself around every cell in the body. At any given second, billions of chemical reactions are occurring. Imagine the timing of the body. If the timing was off, humans would blow themselves up. If everything is working together in a big orchestra, who is the conductor?

Seriously! Stop and think. Who is making your body work if we are creating everything in the world?

Popp studied the body and light rigorously. He had a woman sit in his lab every day for 9 months recording photon readings of a small area of her hand and forehead. What he discovered was light emissions followed a certain pattern at day 7, 14, 32, 80, and 270 days. They were identical even after a year. There was a natural biological rhythm of light in the body.

He wondered what kind of light would be present in an ill person. He tried his machine on a series of cancer patients. Every patient the client had lost their natural rhythm and coherence. The lines of internal communication were scrambled. They had lost their connect with the world. In effect, their light was going out.

Just the opposite occurred with Multiple Sclerosis. MS was a state of too much order. Individuals with this disease were taking in too much light and this was inhibiting of cells to do their job. Too much cooperative harmony prevented flexibility and individuality. MS patients were drowning in light.

Perfect cohesion is an optimum state just between chaos and order. The healthiest bodies would have the lowest amount of light.

Even food is the same. When tested, the healthiest food had the lowest and most coherent intensity of light. Any disturbance in the system would increase the production of photons. Health was a state of perfect subatomic communication, and ill health was a state where communication breaks down. We are ill when our waves are out of synch.

In one of the numerous cases, Popp came across a woman with breast and vaginal cancer. Popp tried mistletoe and other plant extracts on samples of her cancer. Each plant omitted different amount of light. He found one particular mistletoe remedy created a coherence in the tissue similar to that of the body. Within a year of treatment of mistletoe, all her laboratory tests were back to normal. A woman with terminal cancer had her proper light restored, just by taking a herb.

The Language of The Cell
Scientists in the 1980’s were discovering that through biophoton vibrations Popp had discovered in the body caused molecules to vibrate and create its own signature sound. A French Scientist had paused to listen to the tiny oscillations.

How beautiful is it to know that every molecule in your body is creating a sound then that is resonating with the universe? We are constantly broadcasting vibes.

In 1984, studies were being done on reactions of white blood cells to allergens. A lab assist reported to Jacquine Beveniste, A French scientist that there had been a reaction to the white blood count even though there had been too few allergens in the solution. On later investigation, it was discovered that the concentration of allergen in the water was diluted down to nothing and the reminisce of the allergen was still present, it seems that the water had a memory of the allergen even though it was no longer present.

How? In allergen tests, they are testing for anti IgE. Anti IgE was at its highest potency in 1 part to 1000. It started to decrease with each successful dilution. The experiment took a U-turn on the 9th dilution. There was an increase of anti IgE! It continued to increase the more it was diluted. Homeopathy has always claimed the weaker the solution, the more powerful the effect.

Specific information must be transmitting in dilution process. Water has a memory. If water has a memory and can imprint on other water molecules then this would have an impact on how our cells ‘talk’ to each other in our own bodies considering how much of our bodies are made up of water.

Later studies determined that water molecules did not only send signals but amplified it as well. There is a resonating world that is amplified by water within every cell in our body. Water is the universal solvent but it seems that it is the universal communicator too.

The Resonating World
In one of the paragraphs in this chapter left a mark on me. It described a Karl Pribram, a young neurosurgeon. He pondered for 20 years the mysteries surrounding the organization of the brain, perceptions and consciousness. He set up experiments and studied this consistently.

That’s profound. What do you ponder? What leaves you searching for answers, to solve mysteries so much that it
becomes your magnificent obsession? Perfect for this chapter to stop and think what is your resonation in this world?

The Creative Observer
Our universe was once believed to be a series of random event. The deeper science studies consciousness, the more is realized how ordered everything is on every scale. There is another halt to randomness when an observer is present. Studies show that an observer can settle an electron into a set state.

If an observer can influence at such a tiny state, then it leaves us to question, how much can an observer effect reality? How much can the mind influence matter?

It seems a lot.

Schmidt studied the role of the observer. In his research, a machine was created that either flipped heads or tails by a light rotating clockwise or anti clockwise. There are two variables, will it end up with heads or tails and will it rotate clockwise or anticlockwise. In a 12-year period of nearly 2.5 million trials, 52% of all trials and two thirds of the 91 operators had overall success in influencing the machine in the way they had intended it. 52% of people could influence a computer.

If that is not enough to prove its possible and probable that you are influencing your reality, scientist discovered it wasn’t only humans that could influence their world. A new born chick was given a robot as a mother. The robot mother was placed outside the cage of the chick and was programed to randomly walk around. Over time the path was tracked and the robot mother was found to go more times that statistically possible towards the chick. The desire of the ‘mother’s’ closeness was influencing the direction of the robot.

A similar study was done on baby rabbits where a bright light was placed in a moveable REG machine that the rabbits found repulsive. When the data was analysed it showed the rabbit were successful at willing the machine to stay away from them.

What about the people you know who despise or dislike computers. They seem to be the ones with the computer problems. They create challenges to validate their belief on computers and creating their reality.

Couples were tested to see if they produced a positive influence on the heads and tails machine. Couples who did not know each other had the worst outcome than what they achieved individually. ‘Bonded’ couples, those in an intimate relationship had the most profound effect and were 6 times as strong as that of a single operator. The power of a bonded two have a huge influence on their environment.

Studies showed that men were more likely to influence the results from single minded focus. Women were more likely to influence the results by setting the intention and focusing on something else. Perhaps this is an evolutionary effect. That leaves me to wonder what profound influence can you as a couple have on your reality? Or what about a group of people who are bonding together over a common goal?

This is showing that the unconscious mind has a way to communicate with the sub tangible physical world – the quantum world of possibility. This marriage of unformed mind and matter would then assemble itself into something tangible in the manifested world. Reality is then created by each of us only by our attention. We are creating the world.

Here is the spooky and interesting information to mull over. Bob Jahn and Brenda Dunne began playing around with time on their own REG trials. In 87,000 of their experiments, they asked their volunteers to address their attention to the machines operations anywhere from three days to two weeks after the machine had been allowed to run. Once they looked at the data, what they found was incredible. In every regard, this data was identical to the more conventional data they’d generated when their experiments were attempting to influence at the time the machine was being run. There was just one important difference. In the ‘time-displayed’ experiments the volunteers were getting bigger effects than in the standard experiments every time they’d will the machine to produce heads.

What this means is humans have the ability to influence moments other than the present. William Braud had an interesting thought. Time-displaced human intention somehow acts on the probabilities of some occurrences to bring about an outcome, and works best in what Braud liked to call “seed moments” the first chain of events. If you applied this to physical and mental health, it could mean that we could use The Field to directly influences ‘back in time’ to alter pivotal moments or initial conditions which later bloom into full blown problems or disease. In other words, the moment you go back and dissolve an emotional charge in the past, it changes your future.

We are starting to see that every moment influences every other moment, forward and backwards in time.

Tapping into The Field
Braud’s studies suggested that human intention could be used as an extraordinarily potent healing force. Allowing The Field to realign another person’s structure. Elizabeth Targ was a Psychiatrist and had an interesting natural therapist and their influence on healing. She questioned if there was an effect on illness from remote healers.

In one study, they used highly regarded healers in their specialty who had one element in common; success in treating hopeless cases. They used 20 advanced AID’s patents who were terminal continued to use orthodox treatment, only one of the two groups would receive remote healing.

The group was split in two, 10 orthodox treatment and 10 orthodox & healers for treatment. Each healer was given each patients name, photograph and health details. Each participant had a total of 10 healers over the length of the study. They would never meet or have any contact with the patient. The healer kept a log of the healing session, their impressions of their health.

These patients were certain to die. But what she found blew her mind. These patients with end stage AID’s were getting better. During the six months of the trial period. 40 per cent of the control population died. But all 10 of the patients in the healing group were not only still alive but had become healthier based on their own reports and their medical evaluations. There was an inescapable conclusion; the treatment was working.

Later, more refined studies came to the same conclusions. No matter which type of healing they used, no matter their view of a higher being, the healer dramatically contributed to the physical and psychological wellbeing of their patients.

In the Copper Wall Project by another researcher, created a room purely made of copper that would block out electricity from any other sources. They did notice that during healing times, when the patient was in the room the experienced more than normal electrical surges while the person remained completely still. More studies done on Chinese Qigong masters have provided evidence of the presence of photon emission and electromagnetic fields during healing sessions. These surges of energy may be physical evidence of a healer’s greater coherence and his ability to marshal his own quantum energy and transfer it to the less organised recipient. So create order in the chaos.

It didn’t seem to matter the type of healing that was used, that appeared irrelevant. This might mean that the intention of the healer could be as important as his or her medicine. The frantic doctor who wishes his patient cancels so he could have his lunch, or the doctor that stayed up late three nights in a row or drank too much the night before may have a deleterious effect. It might mean that the most important treatment any doctor can give is to hope for health and wellbeing in his patient

Bringing us back to the beginning and understanding that we are connected.

Several studies of heart patients have shown that isolation – from oneself, one’s community and one’s spirituality – rather than physical conditions, such as high cholesterol count, is one of the greatest contributors to disease. In studies of longevity, those people who live longest are often not only those who believe in a higher spiritual being but also those who have the strongest sense of belonging to a community.

The Zero Point Age
Scientists are discovering a unified intelligence that was far greater and more exquisite than Darwin or Newton had imagined, a process that was not random and chaotic, but intelligent and purposeful. They discovered that in the dynamic flow of life, order triumphed.

There no longer be two truths, the truth of science and the truth of religion. There could be one unified vision of the world. We have far more power than we realize, to heal ourselves, our loved ones, and even our communities. Our life in every sense is in our hands. If all information from the cosmos flows through our pores at every moment, then our current notion of our human potential is only a glimmer of what it could be.

With gratitude,

Signature

Running in Empty

Tanya Cross on November 19, 2021

Ever felt like your cup is not only empty but you have given your cup away to someone else and have nothing more to give?

(I see you nodding your head).

That was me recently.

We can all agree the past 18 months have been a little on the crazy side.

For me, I’ve been raising a toddler and starting a new business which is like raising a toddler too.

There’s lots of energy and time that’s required. It doesn’t do exactly what you want. You hear lots of no’s and your zonked at the end of the day and crash.

So I found myself last week realising how much of my life was revolving around work. Other values weren’t getting fulfilled.

I was perceiving that I had a life but I wasn’t living my life.

It doesn’t have to be this way. (Breathe a sigh of relief).

We don’t have one value in our life. We have a small handful of values which are important. And in order to feel fulfilled, all the cups require filling.

For me, my values are facilitating, family, finances, fitness and flying.

If I’m not training and exercising, I feel flat. If I’m not travelling, I feel life is a little dull. If I’m not investing time with my family, especially my little one, my heart doesn’t feel as full.

So, on reflection of my empty and non-existent cups, I decided that if I want my life to be different, I can change my actions to change my life.

I invested in a night away, nourishing the things that are important outside of work. I ate beautiful food with my daughter, strolled through the city with her, I even walked the streets of the city late at night just people watching while listening to music (I’m into country musics – no judgment, it fills my cup).

It didn’t take much to feel full to the brim with more to give to others as we come to the end of the year.

You don’t have to finish the year empty.

So tell me {first_name}, what can you do today to fill your cup up?

With gratitude,

 

Signature

Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator
BAppSoSc (Counselling)
Maximum Growth
One on one & group coaching available

Helping leaders to level up using a transformational mindset work.

PS. Come join the Maximum Growth Academy for your opportunity to learn and apply quality questions every week.

Don’t rely on conscious thought

Tanya Cross on November 9, 2021

We are rolling into another year, and fast. You know you don’t want things to be the same as this year and deep inside you want to level up next year.

So how do you go about making change?

  • If you want to eat better, join an exercise class.
  • If you want to create more business, get networking.
  • If you want to earn more money, serve more clients.

Do the very thing that will give you the outcome you’d love.

That was the conclusion of a 2015 study that followed more than 6000 people for four years. People who increased their exercise increased their intake of fruit and vegetables more than people who continued to exercise regularly or who gave up their fitness plans.

They are the same part of a border goal, doing one gives you a head start on the other.

So how do you get into the new habits that will help you achieve your goals?

When it comes to changing your behaviour, knowing more, having more knowledge in your brain isn’t the key.

Another analysis in 2016 in more than 10,000 people who were told that their lifestyle and genetics are speeding them towards an early grave found that while it changed the way they thought, it made no difference to what they actually did.

It is something that we are all guilty of to some extent, and it happens not because we are weak, but because, most of the time, we aren’t consciously in charge of our actions.

The vast majority of the time, our brains tick over at the unconscious level, responding to cues and enacting habits that are often at odds with our conscious intentions. Actually, as much as 40 percent of our daily behaviour happens without the need for conscious thought.

While a habit is developing, there is conscious input from the prefrontal cortex, which is involved in planning and impulse control. If we repeat the behaviour enough, the prefrontal cortex is taken out of the equation, leaving only reward and action parts of the loop, so our planning skills are free for other things.

This means that these loops can be rerouted, but it takes a huge amount of conscious effort.

To stand any chance of creating a new pattern of behaviour or habits, the first step is to change your perceptions of yourself, so you don’t see yourself in the same light, and don’t therefore make the same decisions and take the same actions.

For example, you want to create more business, but you struggle with identifying as a business owner and having a business mindset. You think it is in other people, not in you.

Then you could create new habits, like get up at 4am, pomodoro your time, or post more on social media.

But you might have found in the past, you tried this, but then slipped back into old habits.

And that’s because old habits are hard to break and new ones are hard to form.

To reprogramme your unconscious, you must first derail the existing problematic habit and use prominent cues to trigger a more desirable one.

To change a habit, you also have to be all in with those decisions. And you can create more drive to change but shifting your mindset, tacking up enough benefits to why the change is important. And then the drive to change outweighs the desire to stay the same.

So stack up benefit, benefit, benefit ontop of each other like sunday pancakes is going to make some internal changes for sure.

Believing in willpower can help too. For decades, psychologists thought that when we exert self-control we run down our reserves of mental strength, leaving us vulnerable to a slip later in the day. But recent research suggests that it might be more to do with attitude.

This showed that people who believed willpower was an unlimited resource were not only better at self-control tasks in the lab but also had better exam grades, ate more healthily and spent money more wisely than those who considered self-control to be limited.

Willpower seems to come in limited supply, until it doesn’t. In fact, the more we use it during the day, the more it gets depleted. This can mean that we are more likely to give up as the day goes on. Just like a muscle, your willpower gets weaker.

Willpower can be in short supply during times of stress, tired, or emotionally vulnerable so we fall back on our old habits. So we don’t want to rely too much on this gem.

If you can feel your willpower is ebbing, you can make a conscious decision to either change the situation, change your environment or the perfect time to bring out your quality questions to increase your willpower tank again.

Recent research suggests believing that there are no limits to our willpower to boost self-control.

So maybe owning (that’s column 2 question of the Demartini Method) the action of “self control” might be the catalyst for creating a profitable business, losing the weight you’d like, or heck, just holding back from lashing out at your spouse, taking a breath, owning their reflection in you.

And don’t think positively. Beware of the idea that to change something, you just have to think positively. Research suggests that fantasising about successfully reaching your goals – whether it is making more money, losing weight, snaring your dream partner or landing a promotion – makes it less likely that you will actually achieve them.

That’s because fantasies conveniently skip to the end of a challenge, remaining sketchy on what is needed to get there. This tricks the body into relaxing as if it had already crossed off the list.

Lastly, you’re a product of both your environment and your thoughts. However, the link between habits and your environment is so strong, often the best time to break a habit or create a new one is when we are going away, coming out of lockdown, moving house, ending or starting a new relationship.

This interruption to our regular pattern means the normal cues can’t be triggered. And you have more chances of creating new cues and triggers. Changing the context enables the mind to arrange new unconscious behaviours, until they, too, become habits.

​So as the new year rolls in, know that if you want things to change, first transform yourself. (Kind of like, if you wanna move the world, first move yourself kind of attitude).

With gratitude,

 

Tanya “kicking some butt” x

Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator
BAppSoSc (Counselling)
Maximum Growth
One on one & group coaching available

Helping leaders to level up using a transformational mindset work.

PS. Come join the Maximum Growth Academy for your opportunity to learn and apply quality questions every week.

Your hairs will stand up reading this one

Tanya Cross on November 2, 2021

This week I have been on the hunt to find a theme song for my life.

One that really encompasses where I am and where I am going. It’s to add to my Divine Design Powerpoint slideshow of what I’d love to create in my business and life.

(It’s kind of like a moving imagery to play for my future every morning before I start work for the day.)

I came across this Sam Smith song.

“how I see myself with you

I don’t say a word

……

And look in my eye

You are perfection

My only direction

It’s fire on fire

It’s fire on fire.

……

But then we love and feel the truth.”

I had rolling goosebumps throughout the song. No, not all of it moves me, but some lines like “You are perfection” does it for me every time. Waves of goosies rolling through my body.

Now, I get that for you, it might not be the case with this song, these words.

For you, it’s more likely to be a different song or scene of a movie as we have different things that will move us.

These connected emotional states involve goosebumps.

So why do you get goosebumps?

OK, let’s get our geek on.

The technical term is cutis anserine (‘cutis’ means skin and ‘anser’ means goose) or piloerection (probably not going to use that word again).

Now, let’s get clear, there are three types of goosebumps. This is how I’ve named them, and they’re not scientific-technical names by any means.

  • The ‘cold’ goosebumps, the ones you get when you’re physiologically cold.
  • The ‘chilli’ goosebumps, the ones that cause a cold shiver down your spine. Usually occurs with a perception of social disgust and fear.
  • The ‘soul’ goosebumps with an experience of awe. Usually occurs with an integration, alignment or truth being told.

The common experience of goosebumps is the ‘chilli’ ones you get when you feel cold, and your hairs stand on end. This reaction is great for animals because all of their hair stands on end, they look bigger and scarier to their predator. For us humans, it helps to create a buffer between your skin and the cool air keeping you a little warmer.

Evolutionary speaking, that came in handing pre-clothing days to keep our body warmer and is still serving that purpose now. (except for those people who lasered their arm hair – they’re now realising the downside. #deepsigh).

Let’s go a little deeper.

There are involuntary muscles just under the skin that, when experiencing a highly emotional state, activate when the sympathetic nervous system or also known as the fight, flight or fright response. When the muscle is contracted, it makes your hairs stand upright and gives you goosebumps.

The goosebumps I’m referring to are the ones you get watching a movie, hearing a speech, reading a passage from a book. It moves you in a deep way and gives you goosebumps.

This feeling of being moved or touched can be accompanied by tears, goosebumps, and sensations of warmth in the centre of the chest or heart plexus.

This experience is described in Sanskrit as kama muta, a feeling of oneness, of love or union.

One particular framework for emotional experiences labelled as moving is the concept called kama muta. Kama muta theory is the sudden increases in closeness and community which evokes a distinctive perceived positive social-relational emotion.

This emotion is often accompanied by tears, goosebumps, and feelings of warmth in the chest, and people often will use the terms such as “moving”, “touching”, or “heartwarming”.

The goosebumps you’ll experience in Maximum Growth classes, living life and doing “the work” are the soul goosebumps.

There are more nuances to why these goosies happen and scientific research is still debating about why we experience these types of goosebumps.

What they do know about goosebumps, after studying brain images, is that it activates certain structures of the brain like the amygdala (the centre for emotions, emotional behaviour, and motivation) and prefrontal cortex (cognitive control functions).

I can tell you from my experience, I’ve been writing my goosebump moments down since 2009. Not every one of them, but a large sample to see what is common to what my soul is saying.

There are some messages in there that are profound statements, like things to do with universal truths, setting a big, crazy goal and achieving it, and receiving a payment from a client with the transaction name being “lifesaver.”

When we align our souls messages with a business, and lead, magic happens. You’ll feel purposeful and that you’re walking the path that you are destined to walk. Every day feels that you get paid to be you and do the things you love most.

So {first_name}, open a new word document, start generating your list of goosies.

Love to hear what is revealed to you. Do you require changing direction in business? Or are you on perfect path for your souls calling?

Here’s to hearing the whispering in your ear from your soul,

 

Tanya “following my knowing” x

Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator
BAppSoSc (Counselling)
Maximum Growth
One on one & group coaching available

Helping leaders to level up using a transformational mindset work.

PS. Come join the Maximum Growth Academy for your opportunity to learn and apply quality questions every week.

No one is teaching this stuff!

Tanya Cross on October 29, 2021

Yesterday, Australia celebrated World Teachers Day.

So big shout out to all the teachers in the world.

And that is you {first_name}!

We’re all students to someone and teachers to others.

Can’t escape it.

Here is the beautiful part, the most profound classroom you’ve ever been in in life is . . . wait for it. . .

Here’s a clue or two:

You can’t buy tickets to it. The teachers are never the same. And it’s right under your nose.

Wanna take a guess?

It’s your everyday life.

Say what?!

I mean, imagine: every day you’re blessed (and sometimes cursed) with moments to teach you more about yourself, what your mission is (and sometimes what it is not).

Life blows every other meditation, seminar, guru etc I can think of right outta the water.

Because it’s relentless. It never ends. And the lessons just keep on coming.

My most recent lesson was painful.

I started training again with more enthusiasm and more goal oriented. I was focused on stepping up in that area of life as it has wavered. I know how important it is for my body, mind and soul, and especially for my business when I exercise, I feel alive.

Day 6 into training, I’m sore in every muscle group, and it huuuuurts so good (sing it with me {first_name}).

My intuition, thank you very much, was saying “slow down,” “take a break” and “rest.”

But did I listen to my teacher?

Nuh.

I forced on with more vigor than before.

And what happens, I’m in the middle of a set of burpees (that’s where you go from push up to jumping and back again). It’s my most hated activity, but I do it anyway.

Midway in my jumping in the air, there was my intuition again saying “Slow”.

I landed and I nearly cried out loud. I strain my quad, the first time ever in my life.

Dust myself off the floor, I hobble back to my apartment with my tail between my legs.

I’d just set a goal, I was working, and working hard to achieve it. All I wanted was to kick some goals.

But my body was teaching me a lesson.

  1. Listen to my body
  2. Follow and intuition
  3. The importance of resting

That’s my lesson for today. (Thanks body).

Your teachers are everywhere. Your clients teach you things you’re not working on. Your finances teach you to be more accountable. Your business shows you the places you require growing.

You’re lesson will be different. Maybe it is to speak up more, ask for what you want. Maybe it is to stop saying yes to things you don’t want to do and more to what aligns with you. Maybe it is to stop serving a client, start serving different ones.

Borrowed from some wise thinker, “the difference between school and life. In school, you are taught a lesson, and then you get a test. In life, you are continually given a test, that teaches you a lesson.”

So why is no one teaching this stuff?

Because everyone has a different life lesson. No two people are here to learn the same thing, they don’t have the same purpose or path to walk.

What is taught is the mindset to make you adaptable to the ever changing landscape.

Let’s face it, sometimes you’re enrolled in the school of hard knocks. Your business is struggling, you’re lacking energy, you’re struggling to show up in doing what you love. You’re supposed to be leading your team, and they rely on you, but you struggle to even show up for yourself.

And then. . . bam. . . You’re slammed again with another lesson.

It all gets a bit too much (***deep sigh, you’re ready to wag school for the day).

In these moments, ask yourself “what’s the lesson here.”

Extract the message and add meaning to the mayhem.

You’ll feel lighter, more present, and purposeful.

Now, I’m listening to my body and my soul, and it’s calling for a casual stroll through the bush paths close to home. I might just whistle as I walk.

Curious to know {first_name}, what’s the life lesson you’re in today?

With gratitude,

 

Signature

Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator
BAppSoSc (Counselling)
Maximum Growth
One on one & group coaching available

Helping leaders to level up using a transformational mindset work.

PS. Come join the Maximum Growth Academy for your opportunity to learn and apply quality questions every week.

PPS – thinking of wanting a daily life lesson the Maximum Growth Walkshop. Dates for 2022 have been set. Just a small group of us. Guaranteed soul-moving conversations and a depth of introspection intensified by being in nature. Plus many life lessons learned. What do you think? Would you be down for that? If you’re thinking “um, that sounds perfect”, then click here so you can be on the “I’m a keen bean list.”

It’s A Guy Thing

Tanya Cross on October 7, 2021

It’s A Guy Thing

This book is for anyone for women (and men) to understand men at a deeper level.

It’s a Guy Thing is full of questions and answers to help women to understand men at a deeper level. It is important to remember with anyone’s body of work, it may not all fit into your model of the world. For me, I analyse every piece of information I gather through universal principles. Some of Deida’s work is brilliant, other parts of the book I discard. I would hope you do the same.

Men and women are so different in the way they think and behave. Men are single-focused; women are multi-focused. Men concentrate on work and resources, females on family and reproduction.

There is a constant contrast between male and female energy. Women identify themselves as the source of light or energy and are then concerned about radiance. Men are more concerned with the void in which the light shines. Most men would rather watch women dance than dance themselves.

This is not to deny that women can only have feminine energy and male have masculine. That is far from the truth. Everyone knows a woman who works in a male-dominated friend like engineering, construction or the police force where they have adapted their energy to their career and play in a man’s world or a man who takes care of the kids.

Deida states 80% of all men demonstrate more masculine than feminine energy. Men in the 20% category are more feminine and more relatable to women in their qualities. We may exhibit different energies around different people and circumstances but our essences will be more one or the other.

The duality of masculine and feminine energy is what brings couples together, it’s the polarity that gives charge and ignites sexual energy between two people. You want polarity. You need it. It is what gives the sizzle in the sexual dynamic.

One reason sexual dynamic becomes less passionate is that it turns into a friendship, business partnership or parenting relationship. The man and women become less and less relaxed in their masculine and feminine poles. Therefore, sexual polarity decreases.

To achieve deep emotional and sexual intimacy, women and men must incarnate deep feminine and masculine energy in the play of their relationship together. If you are not doing this, the relationship can become more practical. The juices dry up.

The purpose of both sexes is to appreciate their own essences without projecting onto the other to be the same as them. It’s about loving the differences. But most of the time the sexes want them to act like they do. It is easier for you to understand someone who thinks and behaves like you.

Men give off masculine energy which for women can be seen as offensive. Masculine energy is rigid and stays focused on a task for lengths of time. This means they won’t notice you, think to call you or text you. They are focused on that task, watching TV, training at the gym, at work that everything else doesn’t exist.

This can be used as a strength to stay focused but it can be a weakness when it shuts out to avoid an intimate relationship, feeling open and vulnerable.

Feminine energy is not stuck on a single track and is flowing and relaxing, you can easily shift attention and focus. For women to be comfortable in her feminine energy, she has to be comfortable in her ability to make the shift happen almost automatically, effortlessly. Women can think “Why isn’t he paying me attention?” “What is his problem?” “Can’t my man learn to go with the flow?” On the other hand, men wonder “why does she get hurt when I am busy?” “Why is she so sensitive?”

Women are very aware of relationships. Men, on the other hand can enjoy themselves even though their relationship is rocky. They can argue with you and go out fishing with their mates. Say “we are fighting; wow look at that fish” This is because men don’t exist in the world of flow and feelings, women do.

This doesn’t mean he does not have emotions or that you become hardened from your emotions. Men love that women are sensitive and in touch with their intuition. He can learn a lot from your world that is foreign to him. Don’t disown your own feelings, express them. Your gift of energy, radiance, and attraction may be in the form of a smile, a look of love, a touch that enlivens him, anything that fills his body, mind, and emotion with energy and love and life.

Men can be vulnerable but not in the way that women are with their feelings. Men demonstrate vulnerability by talking about his vision or his lack of it. A man’s focus is not the relationship so his central issues can be involved in work.

Many difficulties in a relationship occur because men and women think they are the same. And they are similar from certain perspectives. Both men and women have two arms and two legs for example. The only part that is identical is that they both come from light and unconditional love. Bam!

Women want me to be sensitive to their emotions rather than rigid. Men want to have the freedom or the perception of it anyway. Understanding the differences will help you communicate better. Some people value the big picture, others on detail. Notice what your man (or woman) likes and speak in their worldview. Find someone who you can share your natural flow with. For example, if you love the detail, then share the nitty-gritty detail with a friend and share the big picture perspective with your man.

In our verbal based modern life, we often think talking is the best way to communicate love with our intimate partner. Sometimes it is. Sometimes it is not. For a few days, try spending an hour each day being present with your man without either one of you talking at all. Communicate to each other without saying a word. Touch each other. Gaze at each other. Allow the sexual and spiritual energy exchange without words.

That’s a great exercise to do to develop a closeness and connection with your man. Remembering at the highest state of love, there is nothing but ‘Thank you, I love you.” And higher than that, there are no words, only love.

There are some useful questions in the book with staying or going in a relationship. One stand out question was what is the bottom line of the relationship? This helps to create a contract in the relationship of what you want and what you don’t want, what is ok, and what is not ok. This takes out the uncertainty, the expectation of knowing what is in your mind and lay it all out on the table.

Most people have felt a moment of grace when their heart opened and love poured. It may have bene love for a child, a friend or a lover. Your heart might have even opened when looking at a great work of art. These moments illustrate your innate capacity to love. You need only open your heart and you are the force of love. Love is not something you have or don’t have. It is something you work on. Working on the relationship, yourself and your partner help the love to grow.

A perfect relationship is not a relationship that is perfectly fulfilling. It is a relationship that is growing. Sometimes you’ll be apart, sometimes you’ll be together. Within a relationship, love allows all our hidden aspects to rise to the surface and to be worked on. Relationships are about helping you to own more of your hidden side and love all parts of yourself as you love all parts of another human being.

In bed, in a moment of complete union, when you dissolve your boundaries, you see no difference, you allow yourself to be continuous with the one you love. You let go of your guard and relax into surrendered union, you experience seamless oneness.

With gratitude,

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