You have heard people say “Fake it until you make it.”

I cringe when I hear it. 

Here’s why…

Imagine this –  it is your first client session as a coach, or it is your first customer strolling through the doors to buy your product, and you have embraced this idea, fake it until you make it.

It helps you to overcome the anxiety, the anticipation of a no, and something new and uncomfortable, all in the hopes that you’ll breeze through and look more polished and professional like you have more years under your belt than you do.

Nevertheless, while those echoing this line may be well-intentioned, there is one major underlying problem with this saying — an incongruent four-letter word. 

F-A-K-E.

No one wants the fake version of you. 

The fake version is your true self hiding away.

If you start your business by being not true to yourself, selling a fantasy of who you are to the outside world, then you are setting yourself up for a serious amount of strife in business.

So, what do you do? 

Here are the top two universal principle alternatives to ‘Fake It Until You Make It.’

These universal principles will empower you, turning you from a victim of your lack of experience to a master of your vocational destiny. 

Face it until you ace it.

People appreciate your raw and real self. Own all parts of yourself and that you are new at your craft, or your facing a new challenge you haven’t faced before with a client. 

You swap one tiny letter, — the “k” for the “c” — and your authentic self shows up. No need to hide a part of yourself or your insecurities. 

I personally say “Let’s talk this out” when I am faced with a challenge I am unsure of. I process out loud with the client. It doesn’t help the client if I go in with all guns blazing with the client thinking I have done this type of session a zillion times. 

Sometimes I might just say ‘hey, this is a first for me.’ But my love of serving is what matters, not my skill. Because we get there in the end. If I sell an idea, we are going to smash through this in 20 minutes, and they (and I) will be let down. 

Do you notice the difference? Humility pays. Arrogance costs. 

Use humility and lack of experience for you, not against you.

Learn it until you earn it.

When you fake it before you make it, you are better than you are, when you’ve really only started your journey. No one is an expert at the beginning of their career. Think of the 10,000-hour rule. According to Gladwell, you could become an expert in nearly any field as long as you are willing to devote the requisite 10,000 hours to studying and practising the subject or skill. 

When you come across as more knowledgeable, it can come across cocking rather than contributing. Expect a little humble slapping my friend. 

Instead, “learn it until you earn it.”  Continue your learning journey, knowing it will pay off for you. 

I am still fascinated by humans – 14 years later. Even now, as we apply the Demartini Method on abstract and astronomical things, like the sun, the ever-changing ocean, and even a black hole, people are realising that there is greatness inside themselves that brings them to tears. 

I never want to stop learning about humans. Yes, never.

Being a continual learner alleviates any pressure we place on ourselves to be at the top. There isn’t a top. Focus on the journey. 

The problem under the problem

Let’s face it, the expectations of society often push us towards the belief that we need to pretend until we’ve achieved success. Or at the very least, there is an emphasis on being successful. 

However, true accomplishment is not about reaching the pinnacle instantly or maybe not at all. When we are green we are growing, when we are ripe we are rotten. 

It’s about embracing the daily climb and confronting challenges with courage, humility, and perseverance.

Instead of “fake it until you make it,” choose alternative approaches like face it until you ace it and learn it until you earn it, as they emphasize the value of authenticity and a growth mindset.

By embracing these two alternative approaches, you create an environment where genuine growth and progress can flourish, allowing for a truly transformative experience.

Onwards and upwards,

Tanya x

Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator

BAppSoSc (Counselling)

Maximum Growth

This time of year allows us the opportunity to reflect on our income. And perhaps a step further, our financial future. 

I remember growing up with a friend who owned a major real estate company in Melbourne. I was 10 when I went to her home for the first time. It had so many bedrooms, I was lost inside, a green grass tennis court, and a short stroll to the beach. 

It was sold for $8 million a few years ago. 

Going back home to my middle-class life, at that time, 50% or more of Aussies were much wealthier than my family and enjoyed fancy homes, flashy cars and luxurious lives.

Fast forward some time, the top 10% seemed to be the number that used to describe wealthy Australians. This was usually measured by their net worth. If you were in the top 10% you were doing very nicely thank you very much.

Today, the percentage is shrinking even further, and wealthy people seem to be in the top 1%.

So what does it take to be among the top 1% by net worth?

The amount of money you need to hit a 1% milestone in Australia has doubled in the past 2 years in now sits at 5.5 USD (8.3 million) of net worth.

Well, my childhood friend’s parents, assuming they have other assets would be sitting pretty now, having sold their property at an event 8 mil. 

In Australia, we rank third behind Monaco, Switzerland, New Zealand and the US and require at least 5 million USD.

In Australia, the wealthiest typically have only about 3 homes. Some have commercial properties and shares are the biggest asset holding.

8 million, you say?

Well, not if we move to another country. 

• The top 1% of people in India hold at least $175000 USD or $264000 AUD of wealth
• The top 1% of people in the Philippines it’s $57000 USD or $86000 AUD
• The top 1% of people in Kenya it’s $20000 USD or $30000 AUD,

But not everyone wants to uproot their life and go and live like a king or queen in a foreign country. 

And it depends on what type of lifestyle you want. 

Do you want to go away 3 months of the year around the world, travelling business class or do you want to stay at home and spend it with your family? 

Your spending will have a lot to do with the number. 

So do you want to be in the top 1%?

Or perhaps aim to be in the top 10% for the top 20% or even 40%?

Remember, wealth comes in many different forms. Yes, there is the financial monetary form, and there is wealth from relationship stability, being healthy physically, or strong social bonds and connections.

• Why not reset (or set) your objective?
• What are you working for?
• What is your financial goal? 
• What are your life dreams you’d love to work towards?

Then this time of year, you can check in to see how you are tracking not only financially but all areas of your life. 

Onwards and upwards, 

Tanya x

Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator

BAppSoSc (Counselling)

Maximum Growth

Tell me what you’re stressed about, and I’ll tell you your illness.

I have your ears pricked up, don’t I?

This intriguing question: “Can the most stressful life events predict future illness?” has captivated researchers and medical professionals for decades. 

In 1967, two researchers named Thomas Holmes and Richard Rahe embarked on a groundbreaking study to explore the potential correlation between stress-inducing life events and the likelihood of developing illnesses. 

The outcome of their study was the development of the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale, a tool widely used to assess the impact of stress on health. 

Holmes and Rahe’s study involved an extensive analysis of the medical records of over 5,000 patients. Their primary objective was to determine whether there was a clear connection between highly stressful life events and the subsequent development of illnesses. 

To their astonishment, the researchers uncovered a strong correlation. This correlation was so significant that Holmes and Rahe decided to rank the stressful life events they identified on a scale ranging from the most stressful to the least stressful. 

So, what are these life events that the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale takes into account? 

They encompass a range of circumstances that many of us encounter throughout our lives. 

Some examples include 

• Death of a loved one
• Divorce
• Job loss
• Financial difficulties
• Relocation
• Getting married
• Taking a vacation (say what?!? It’s a matter of perspective – haha)

After lots of studies using this metric, researchers have concluded that stress impacts your physiology. 

But you want to know more about your specific stress, don’t you?

Relationship Stress

Studies have linked relationship stress to a higher risk of cardiovascular diseases, weakened immune function, and mental health disorders such as anxiety and depression.

Relationship stress can sometimes manifest as psychosomatic symptoms—physical symptoms that arise from emotional or psychological distress including headaches, digestive issues, muscle tension, or chronic pain.

Financial Stress

The toll of financial stress extends beyond mental health and can manifest in various physical health issues. High levels of stress hormones, such as cortisol, associated with financial strain can lead to elevated blood pressure, weakened immune function, and an increased risk of cardiovascular diseases.

Financial stress often disrupts sleep patterns, leading to difficulties falling asleep, staying asleep, or experiencing restful sleep. Sleep deprivation can have far-reaching consequences such as diabetes and weakened immune system function so you’re more prone to viruses and colds. 

Family Stress

Family stress can significantly impact our mental well-being. Conflicts, strained relationships, and feelings of resentment or obligation can contribute to increased stress levels and emotional distress. This chronic exposure to family stress can lead to conditions such as anxiety and depression.

Home is where you spend a lot of time in, and prolonged exposure to stress hormones, such as cortisol, associated with family stress can lead to elevated blood pressure, weakened immune function, and an increased risk of chronic diseases such as cardiovascular disorders. 

Workplace Stress

Jobs that involve repetitive tasks, poor ergonomics, or physical strain can contribute to the development of musculoskeletal disorders. Workplace stress can exacerbate these conditions by increasing muscle tension and promoting poor posture, leading to issues such as back pain, neck pain, and repetitive strain injuries.

High levels of stress can impair cognitive function, affecting memory, concentration, and decision-making abilities. This can hinder productivity and performance at work, further adding to the stress.

So tell me what you’re stressed about, and I’ll tell you your illness. OK, it’s not a science, but there are potential determinants that impact health. 

Each time you apply the Demartini Method and bring your perceived stressful perceptions into balance, you dissolve your stress and you place your body and mind into homeostasis, and the optimal place for wellness to occur. 

With gratitude,

Tanya x

Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator

BAppSoSc (Counselling)

Maximum Growth

In one of the lessons in The Power Walkshop, 8 people were standing on a massive hill, overlooking a vast landscape of rolling hills, seeing the ocean off in the distance. 

Yet, as we stood at the top of this hill, each individual had their own perspective of the hill, the view and their life. 

Your perception is the lens through which you view the world. What you perceive is not an objective representation of reality but a construction crafted by your mind. 

And it can distort or illuminate your understanding. 

The hill is a great example of this. 

Everyone had a different perspective of walking up the hill, the view at the top of the hill and if you wanted to go seek another hill or go back down to the plains again. 

The power of perception shapes your understanding and experiences. It acts as both an illuminating force, offering clarity and insight, and a distorting lens that can cloud your judgment. 

Your perception deeply influences how you interpret and interact with the world around you, creating your thoughts and emotions and guiding your actions. 

Your perception is influenced by your past experiences, both positive and negative. 

Memories shape your understanding of the present, creating a framework through which you interpret new information. 

A traumatic event may taint our perception, leading us to see danger where none exists or causing us to perceive threats as more significant than they are. 

So if you have walked a hill before and strained a muscle, you might be a little wary this time. 

On the other hand, perceived positive experiences can foster optimism, colouring your perception with a brighter hue, like summiting your first mountain (and a hill is easily achieved).

Throw into the mix your cognitive biases to further shape your perception, introducing subtle distortions and shortcuts that influence your judgment. 

Confirmation bias, for example, leads you to seek information that supports your existing beliefs while disregarding or downplaying conflicting evidence. AKA “this hill is hard”, and you walk on the squishiest part of the hill and it’s incredibly difficult to walk. 

This bias can lead to a narrow and skewed understanding of the world, reinforcing your preconceived notions and inhibiting your ability to consider alternative perspectives. 

Your perception is not solely an internal process. It is deeply intertwined with your interactions and relationships with others. 

Social dynamics influence your perception, as you are a social being deeply influenced by your social environment. 

Peer pressure (I have to walk the hill – because everyone else is doing it) and societal expectations (I’m on course, I have to walk the hill, and god forbid I should stop halfway) shape your perception, influencing your behaviour and guiding your choices. 

The opinions and judgments of others (I don’t want to let the group down) can have a profound impact on how we perceive ourselves and the world, often leading us to conform or seek approval.

However, it is essential to recognize that our perception is not fixed or immutable. It is malleable and subject to change. 

Through self-reflection and introspection, we can become more aware of our biases, assumptions, and preconceptions. 

That’s what the Demartini Method is doing to your mind, remoulding it, making it malleable by seeking different perspectives and engaging in an internal dialogue with yourself to broaden your understanding and challenge your ingrained perceptions. 

This process of self-reflection allows us to peel away the layers of distortion and create a more accurate view of the world.

In the realm of personal growth and self-discovery, understanding the power of perception liberates us from self-imposed limitations. No hill is too big to summit. 

It invites us to question the narratives we construct about ourselves and the world and create new hills of possibilities. 

By challenging our self-perceptions and expanding our horizons, we can transcend self-imposed barriers and unlock our full potential.

So, as you navigate the labyrinth of perception, remember that your understanding of the next hill you’re about to climb, remember your perception is a reflection of your unique lens. 

As the philosopher William James once wrote:

“The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another.”

The power of perception shapes our experiences and responses to the challenges we encounter. It reminds us that our perception is not a passive process but an active choice we make in how we interpret and navigate the world.

In every hill we face, whether literal or metaphorical, our perception determines whether we see it as an insurmountable obstacle or an opportunity for growth. It is our ability to choose empowering thoughts and perspectives that enable us to overcome adversity and embrace the journey of self-discovery.

So, as you embark on your next adventure, be it climbing a hill or tackling the hurdles in your life, remember that your perception holds the key to unlocking your true potential. 

With a mind attuned to the transformative power of perception, there are no limits to what you can achieve.

So, take a deep breath, adjust your lens, and let the beauty of your chosen perceptions illuminate your path. 

The hills may rise before you, but by shifting your perception, you will rise above them.

May your perception be a kaleidoscope of wonder, revealing the hidden beauty in every moment.

If you are interested in joining me for the next Power Walkshop, then you can opt-in here. 

Places are limited. 

With gratitude,

Tanya x

Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator

BAppSoSc (Counselling)

Maximum Growth