Are you hiding?

Subject: Are you hiding?

In session last week with Elizabeth (let’s call her that here), something profound happened that I have to share with you.

She has a dream inside her to be a writer for as long as she can remember. #EatPrayLove but more #CareShareBare(your soul)style.

She has a relatively new coaching business and it’s not financially where she’d like it but it’s growing in income and impact.

With the rising success, her work isn’t what makes her heart sing.

Writing does.

She is met with tones of brain noise in her business. Her internal chatter is so loud it’s distracting and draining her of any creative juices she has inside her.

Now, add an extra layer of complexity to the dynamic and she perceives herself to be behind.

She wants to be further along the success path than she is. So she’s pushing and forcing her business forward.

This means grinding every day out of fear. Her thoughts raced to unknowns; if she dropped the ball, if she didn’t make that sales call; if she didn’t produce content, if she didn’t wake up before 5am, there would be no ball to pick up again and her business would cease to exist.

(oh yeah and not to mention she’s be working on every time zone in the world, trying to be in all places at once like some inconceivable super human).

It’s creating a business out of desperation which leads to deprivation.

Deprivation means the drive to offer your service comes from a feeling of lack, not abundance.

I know too many people in the world who are not doing what they feel called to do and forcing themselves down a path of necessity to get them where they want to go.

They think “I’ll do this to make enough money now to set me up to do the thing I love later.”

What they’re really saying is “I’ll sell my soul for a price today and hope that sometimes in the future I’ll get to do what I love. Maybe.”

Now, if you died tomorrow, you’d die without shining your light on the world.

The purpose of life is to live a life of purpose. Don’t let money blind you on your path.

Some wise words from Steve Jobs, “your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking.”

The secret to a fulfilled life is to find out what your purpose is and then follow it.

That means trusting in your soul’s calling and for divine guidance to light the way.

And let the money be the byproduct of the inspired message you’d love to share with the world.

Remember, it is “not how long, but how well you have lived is the main thing.” Seneca.

Circling back to the session with Elizabeth. We are coming close to the end of the session. She is wanting to get more of her creative writing juices flowing so she says “I’ll write every day for an hour at 3pm for one hour.”

Just as she had finished the sentence, Amazon Alexa (a smart home system thingy)pipes up and says “I’ll set an alarm for you at 3pm every day.”

#tearsandgoosebumps!

Seriously, if this was not a moment where the universe was conspiring to make this girl do her purpose, I don’t know what is.

So are you living your purpose? Are you doing what your soul is calling (or screaming) at you to do?

And what needs to shift to level up in 2022 to make a bigger impact with your purpose?

Much love,

 

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P.S. So it’s time for me to take a break from coaching and re-energise with my family and pouring over some really cool books I’ve purchased about somatic coaching, trauma, attachment disorders and emotions. We restart MG classes on Wednesday, 13th January. I’ve purchased some really cool books to read over the summer break on somatic coaching, trauma, attachment disorders and emotions.

You can still contact Claire about your membership, or anything MG related. She’ll be around.

P.P.S. If you’re not a member and you’d love to join the 12 hours of planning classes we have coming up, please register your interest here.

I bent a spoon with my mind

I bent a spoon with my mind on Wednesday.

Say what?!

I was given 5 tablespoons at the start of the Quantum Spoon Bending course on Monday.

I gave it my best effort to bend these metal utensils with all my might (so much so I had a vein popping out of my head I was trying so hard) but it did not budge.

They became my friends for three days, hanging with me everywhere I went. I felt connected to them, and even worried about them when I didn’t know where I put them.

Now, let’s get something straight about spoon bending ????.

It isn’t a scene from Carrie, where you look at the spoon, and it twists around in circles.

There is some action by touching the spoon that is required.

The part of bending it with the mind was using these;

  • Intention
  • Certainty
  • Focus
  • Energy
  • Belief
  • And the exponential power of love

Plus you’re in a meditative state too, accessing your higher powered self so that helps to access a greater power too.

Now, over the period of the three days, doubt flooded me. Doubt in the possibility of doing it.

What if I spent all this money and I don’t bend a spoon? Plus, 3 days away from my daughter is a lot for no outcome.

Like we do in Maximum Growth classes, I looked for the problem under the problem. It revealed doubt was a coverup for the drive to excel entangled with a fear of failure.

We have that in everyday life. We doubt if we can make money, grow our business, take a break for a moment and our business survive.

I became comfortable with failure. I realised there is only love (thanks to some divine intervention from a book I found). I owned where I have bent reality in different moments in life.

So, waking up on Wednesday, I felt certainty run through my veins.

We get ready to bend spoons for the first time.

I’m laying down, my spoons on my belly and flowing with the guided meditation.

After a while, I’m instructed to pick up the spoon. Our instructor says over the top of the meditation in a soothing voice, “treat your spoon like your lover.”

“Oh la la… how lucky is this spoon.” (nothing is missing moment, thank you very much universe).

Getting serious, I connected with my spoon, feeling it, being grateful for its existence, then started to feel like it was an extension of myself. I felt an enormous amount of love for this spoon. I began to rub the spoon like I was caressing my own arm.

Over a period of time, I could feel the energy in my fingers transfer to the spoon.

It wasn’t just two fingers, all my fingers felt like they were on fire. I’d touch the spoon in a different spot and the spoon would become hot.

I tried to bend the spoon, but nothing.

This could have been a deflating moment where I doubted I couldn’t do it, but my certainty about doing it outweighs my reality of not feeling it happen.

(that’s a life lesson right there – believing over your current reality!)

I kept talking to the spoon, imagining the particles vibrating with my touch. I kept repeating “bend” and tried again.

Nothing.

My internal cheer squad stepped in now, “Tan, you’ve got this.”

After a few more attempts, I pushed the spoon with some pressure it bent to a right angle and stopped in its tracks.

“Thank you spoon.”

Without hesitation, I picked up the next spoon, ready to go again.

Repeating my internal mantras, my certainty of the possibilities increasing, I attempt to bend the second spoon.

Nothing.

Again.

Nothing.

The third time, there was movement, a little more than last time.

Onto the third spoon.

This one was a little heavier than the first two. I touched this spoon for about 10 seconds and felt drawn to bend.

Without questioning, I touched the tip of the spoon, and this time, it felt as if it was liquid and bent with grace and ease all the way back to the handle in one fluid movement.

Round one is complete and we come out of round one of meditation.

Here is what I learned;

  • Even when something is fixed, it can also be flexible given different circumstances.
  • Focused energy builds momentum
  • And doubt cancels abundance and possibilities

So consider what you doubt as a possibility now?

And what would you like to shift in your mindset to create certainty in your life?

Something to ponder as we step into 2022.

With gratitude,

 

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Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator
BAppSoSc (Counselling)
Maximum Growth
One on one & group coaching available

Helping leaders to level up using a transformational mindset work.

PS. If you’re keen to watch the Ask Me, Anything class, where I explain the spoon bending experience in more detail, click here.

Who needs a clutter free environment to work?

It’s amazing what will distract you during the day.

You set the intention to work. You’re ready and geared to reduce your inbox, create some content, do those admin tasks that have been building up. Today is the day!

Start time approaches.

You’re about to walk to your desk, and you notice the house is a mess. You wonder how it managed to get to this state while picking up after the other family members.

Your focused is on tidying. Your eye catches the pile of dishes in the kitchen that was left from breakfast.

Without even thinking you’re stacking the dishwasher and wiping the benches. Then work pops into your mind. You say to yourself, “I’ll get to it in a minute, I’ll just finish here first.”

You’re 30 minutes behind when you make your way to the office.

Your eyes dart to the piles of papers, the leftover cup from yesterday, little grubby paw prints over your laptop keypad from someone eating something sticky.

#Mydeskismysanctuary… A few choice words to the family member responsible.

You can’t focus on what you have to do without having a clear and clean space to work (deep sigh).

You’ve tried to work in the mess before. But the mess in your environment creeps into your headspace and you can’t seem to collect your thoughts. You’re frustrated at others, you’re upset they don’t think of you and you have to do so much around the house.

Plus, you’re a perfectionist and want things to be ‘just right.’ Your environment has to be perfect, your work perfect, you have to be the perfect spouse, parent, friend.

I know this experience to be true for many people because it’s a common problem that clients who run a business and a household (plus work from home) raise in a session.

As you know your clients can sometimes be a reflection of yourself so I’ll put my hand up to say I’ve focused on cleaning and not working at times (it happens now when I am stressed, some people bite their nails, I clean).

I have dug deep into the depths of mine and others’ internal thinking to understand why.

Here is the top learning that has been the most helpful in transforming this experience.

Life is like a juggling act of priorities. Which thing is more important than another?

You’ll know what’s important by the decisions you make in your life.

Essentially, every point in your life is a decision.

You wake up in the morning. You decide what you’re going to do next. Do you pick up your phone and scroll through social media to see what the world is doing? Do you open your emails to see if any income work came through overnight? Or read your mission statement in your notes? Or channel your pre-2008 life version (no smartphones peeps) and lay there contemplating your day?

8 am comes around and you’re deciding (if you’re in a job or have your own business) what you’re going to do next.

At night when the kids are in bed, you have another decision point. Do you read a book you’ve been contemplating for weeks that sits on your bedside table or Netflix all night? Do you stay up one more hour and watch one more episode because you can’t go to sleep without knowing what happens next? (Which it does for every episode and you say to yourself “I’ll go to sleep earlier tomorrow night”).

Have you ever stopped to contemplate are the decisions you’re making leading you to the goals you have in the future?

Consider it.

Reflect on your last week.

Did you do the things to help move the needle a little closer in the direction you’re aiming for?

Or did the decision distract you?

If it’s not tidying the house that distracts you, maybe it’s something else like mindless scrolling of social media or family/relationship distractions or other people’s problems in business.

Whatever it is for you, you’re the captain here. No one else is making you do anything you don’t want to do with your life.

Remember the quality of your life is determined by the quality of questions you ask and the quality of answers you provide.

You can ask the question at every decision point what is more important right now for my future self?

Is what I’m about to do leading me to where I’d love to grow and go?

If yes, great. Go take a step or a leap forward.

If not, pause. Look at the drawbacks of what you don’t want to be doing. Drawback. Drawback. Drawback. And find the benefit of what you’d like to do instead. Benefit. Benefit. Benefit.

Inch by inch. Day by day. You’ll start to notice that your life is unfolding exactly in the way that you’d love it to be.

Because let’s face it. Do you want to be known for a tidy home or for sharing your light with the world?

Go shine bright stardust.

With gratitude,

 

Signature

Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator
BAppSoSc (Counselling)
Maximum Growth
One on one & group coaching available

Helping leaders to level up using a transformational mindset work.

PS. Feeling a little distracted with low priorities and want to redirect your focus? Keep an eye out next week for our New Years Classes to refocus and create an inspiring 2021.

Nothing Is Missing, What Are You Searching For?